Sagacious Himself — brevity in circumlocution: never blague — suffering genius

March 14, 2013

aug 13 2012 draft: lightweight windows IVR server

Filed under: 170914 — Sagacious Himself @ 2:25 pm

windows user?  vaguely familiar with voip but no personal PBX?

you might enjoy running an IVR server.  It acts as UA (sip client that registers to your voip provider[‘s extension])

http://www.myvoipapp.com/docs/mss_services/auto_attendant/index.html

hmmmm this Chromium profile does not play well with WP.  Sigh must fab new profile exclusively for wp

[image: registration tab]

If Plum’s QuickFuse is too daunting (it’s not, but using what you’ve designed probably is) then you can easily dsign your IVR without knowing a lick of VoiceXML.

  • Send callers to a sub_account of your voip
    • (sadly/foolishly not all VSP offer this),
  •  the IVR server is registered to that sub_account,

and torment people with “press 1 for hangup on automated dialers, press 2 to ring my home sip device, presss 4 to play globalthermonuclear war”

Combine with either/both

  • CallerID_number filtering
  • CNAM filtering

Ideal to

  • harass telemarketers into blacklisting your number
    • having your number market as “troublesome” is far more effective than requesting DoNotCall list addition
  • automatically request  “add to DoNotCall list” and “remove from all lists” and “do not call again [click]”
  • waste caller’s “valuable” time with logical loops
  • simulate a real person
    • use timeout for each leg instead of requiring response
    • “hello”
    • pause
    • “please explain that”
    • pause pause pause
    • “interesting”
    • pause
    • “tell me more about that”
    • loop_explainthat
  • require undesirable callers listed to ELABORATE telecommunication terms
    • read-in boilerplate terms from your favorite site with jibberish minutes in
    • use text to speech to avoid personal tedium and increase caller frustration
  • require acceptance of call recording else hangup
    • transfer on acceptance
  • FAKE speech recognition,
    • “say 1 to blah, say 2 to notblah”
    • I’m soar-eee response not recognized
    • loop ad infinitum or however many minutes you want to pay for torment at value rates $0.005/min
  • ideal for 419 scambaiting
    • optional voicemail capture with your favorite free SIP provider

 

 

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